One Plus One Equals One

For whatever reasons, I’ve been going over the idea of soul mates for the past couple of days. A soul mate is defined as a person to which another has a natural affinity, similarity, and compatibility with.  It is a simple, yet complex, idea that somewhere out there in this world is the perfect person for you. A person you unequivocably connect with on all levels-physically, mentally, spiritually, & sexually. It’s an interesting concept. There are over six billion people living in this world, spanning across a surface area of 510,072,000 km2 (yep, I Googled that). And yet somehow despite all these un-encouraging variables people can still proclaim that they found that person that they can actually give the title of “the one.” Perhaps us having a soul mate isn’t as farfetched as it seems since the idea has existed for centuries in both lore and some religions.

The first written explanation of the concept appeared in Ancient Greece is it me, or do most explanations come from Ancient Greece?. It appeared in Plato’s The Symposium and was written by the comic-playwright Aristophanes.  In his speech he explains that in the beginning, when the human race was created, they were doubled bodied and had two heads, four arms, and four legs. Also, these humans consisted of three genders: all male, all female, and the androgynous. They were powerful creatures and like all creatures of power they sought out to defeat those who were considered more powerful, i.e. the Greek gods. So they began to scale Mount Olympus to enter heaven. In response to this Zeus his ole incestuous, trifling, overactive penis, having self. I’m pretty sure he was the first slut in literature was going to destroy the beings with his lightning bolts. Then he remembered how self-absorbed he was and how he loved to be praised on everyday that ended with a “y,” so he decided to chop ’em all in half, creating two separate bodies. Ever since then, man and woman have been wondering around the Earth looking for their other half, because they are trying to regain their original form.

So how does that sound? Like a bunch of crock? Well it does have its merits. The same concept can be found in the religion of Christianity. Just like in the Aristophanes speech, we as human beings (particularly men) are missing a piece of ourselves. We all know the part of the Bible I’m talking about, right? (I’d be more specific but I’ve never read the Bible but I’m pretty positive this part is in there and I’d hate to misquote it. If not………………….whooops lol). Anyway, wouldn’t we inherently look for that missing piece, so that we could feel complete?

Personally I believe that we all have a soul mate. That one person we naturally connect with in multiple ways, with little to no effort. But that’s just me. Basically, my point of writing this is just to say, keep looking for that one ’cause they’re out there looking for you. Wow that was sappy. I’m going to blame it on a lack of sleep and Natasha.

^^#random my favorite Natasha Bedingfield song ever

What Is Marvin’s Room?

My friend Trey touched upon this particular debacle a few days ago but with all the recent statuses and tweets I’ve been seeing lately I feel obligated to put my two-cents in. Last week Drake proudly presented the public with some new music (if you want to call anything by Drake music) entitled “Marvin’s Room.” After this song’s arrival people did one of three things:

  1. Embraced the idea and were all of a sudden on their “Marvin’s Room shit” every other day
  2. Just didn’t give a damn
  3. Just wanted the answer to one simple question, “what the hell is Marvin’s room?”

While I would have preferred that everyone just didn’t give a damn, I will be kind enough to provide you with an answer to what Marvin’s room is. It all begins with a story.

Once upon a time, in a land not that far away prolly Atalanta, we all know that’s where most ignorant stuff starts, there was a guy. His name was Marvin. Marvin was one of those “I-Think-I’m-God’s-Gift-To-The-World” type of people. You know the type or are the type. Arrogant, presumptuous, kinda overbearing. Basically Marvin was a dick. Anyway, Marvin had a girlfriend. She was beautiful, kind-hearted, yadda, yadda, yadda, you get the point. Shew as a good girlfriend. They had been dating for nearly a year and a half when tragedy struck. Marvin cheated! -__- bet you ain’t see that coming right? To make a long story short:

  • she found out
  • they broke up
  • Marvin lived in denial about his transgression and couldn’t and/or wouldn’t acknowledge that he hurt her
  • It took some time but the girlfriend moved on and got another man
  • it wasn’t until she got another man, that Marvin realized how badly he screwed up
  • One night while he was drunk off loneliness he decided to call up his ex on the landline (remember this was a long time ago) in his room. And it was in this particular room that he first uttered the words that Drake would come to rip off in present day (lets be real, not much Drake says is original), “Fuck that [guy] that you love so bad, I know you still think about the times we had.”

I’m pretty sure Marvin died in that room and now his spirit is possessing people; drawing them into his dreaded room to make these stupid phone calls. Marvin’s room is a place where ex’s come once they’ve realized how badly they ruined their previous relationship, usually entering this room around the same time they find out you’ve moved on. Once in the room they usually find some type of alcoholic beverage and drink until they have the balls to make a phone call where they confess they messed up and how much they miss you. It’s all quite pitiful when you think about it  but then again some of you might be dumb enough to think its cute or something like that.

Here’s my advice, stay out of Marvin’s Room. Judging from the lyrical stylings of Drake and the much better cover by JoJo, you’ll die of high blood pressure due to the high concentration of salt the room seems to produce. The best way to stay out is by listening to what my friend @this_is_raelity said, “the most overused phrase in the world is ‘you never know what you have until it’s gone.’ We ALL know this, so how about you start appreciating what you have…”

Ok. I’m done with this one. Enjoy your day.

P.S. remember that all your ex’s aren’t chilling in Marvin’s room. Just the ones who are just now realizing how badly they screwed up the best relationship they had due to their own actions such as cheating, being too controlling, not being attentive, etc.